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    • On the River in the Sun

      Posted at 3:41 pm by writergherlone, on February 18, 2021

      On the River in the Sun

      Story and Art by Kristy Gherlone

      **This story originally appeared in the January 2020 issue of “Scarlet Leaf Review.”

      “Charlie? Time to get up, son.” 

           Pulled from sleep, Charlie stretched and kicked the covers aside. He’d been in the middle of a dream. He’d been digging through the ice cream chest at the corner store up the road from his grandpa’s cottage, trying to decide between a Klondike or a Snickers bar.‘Take ‘em both if you’d like. A little ice cream on a hot day never killed anyone,’ his grandfather had chuckled. ‘You’re gonna need some fuel to catch those trout’. Charlie was still smiling when he opened his eyes and looked up. 

           “Did you hear me?” his father asked, switching on the light. He was wearing his suit and tie.

           “I heard,” Charlie answered back. He sat up and yawned. Fully roused, the events of the day before came rushing back. It made his chest feel heavy, as if someone was squeezing it. His grandfather wasn’t at the cottage. He was laying as still as a sunning turtle in a wood box under the ground.

           “I have to go into the office,” his father said. “Your mother’s getting your breakfast ready. She’s going to drop you off at school and then go and sit with your Aunt June.”

           Charlie flopped back down, grabbed the covers, and pulled them up over his head. “You said you had the whole day off ‘cause of what happened,” he whined. “You said I didn’t have to go to school.”

           “I know and I’m sorry. Things didn’t work out like I planned. Besides, I think it’s best if everyone just gets back to normal. There’s no sense in sitting around moping. You’ll feel better once you see your friends. You’ll see,” he said before breezing out. 

           Charlie threw the covers back off. “Dad,” he called.

           “Yeah?” his father answered.

           “How long is Grandpa planning on being dead for?”

           Charlie’s father sighed. He came back into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. “I thought we talked about this. You’re eight now. You’re old enough to understand about death.” 

           Charlie understood about death. He didn’t know why he’d asked such a dumb question. He figured it was because he wanted his father to say something; something that would make everything alright.

           “Dead is forever,” his father said. He brushed the hair out of Charlie’s eyes. “Remember when Copper died? Do you remember what we told you?”

           Charlie nodded

           “Well, it’s the same thing with grandpa. He’s in a better place now.”

           “With Copper?” Charlie asked. 

           “Maybe,” his father shrugged.

           Charlie pulled the blanket back up over his head. It wasn’t possible there was a place better for his grandpa than the cottage. There might be somewhere better for a dog, but people were different. 

           “Listen, I have to get going,” his father said, getting up. “If you have any more questions, I’m sure your mom can help you out. I’m late.”

           “But what if Grandpa gets to that place, wherever it is, and doesn’t like it?” 

           “He can’t come back, Charlie,” his father said, his voice firm. “It’s not possible. I know it’s hard, but that’s just the way it is.”

           “But summer’s starting in a couple of weeks. Who’s going to watch me? Who’s going to take me to the cottage?” 

           “Let’s not worry about that right now. We’ll figure something out. Now hurry up, okay? Your mom’s waiting.” 

            Charlie got up and plodded towards the bathroom. His parents were talking down in the kitchen. 

          “I can’t believe you’re going in to work so soon after your father’s funeral,” Charlie’s mother said. “I know you two didn’t see eye to eye, but it just doesn’t seem right. I mean, what about Charlie? Your father may have been a thorn in your side, but Charlie loved him very much. He needs you right now.”

          “Shhh,” his father said. “He’ll hear you.”

           Charlie crept over to the top of the stairs to listen, even though he wasn’t supposed to eavesdrop.

          “Well, I just can’t believe it,” his mother said, lowering her voice.

          “Why?” his father asked. “He would have done the same thing. The man didn’t take a day off from work in forty years.” 

          “But it’s your father,” she said. “And now I’m the one who has to go and comfort your sister all day.”

          “Then don’t go! I don’t know why she’s so bent out of shape anyway. He treated her the same way he treated me. He was barely even around when we were growing up and when he was, he ignored us. The only thing that man ever cared about was work.” 

          “That’s not true,” Charlie’s mother said. “He cared about Charlie.”

          “Well it was true for me!” Charlie’s father boomed, then lowered his voice again. “I’m glad he cared about Charlie. I’m glad he took an interest. I just wish…,” he started, but didn’t finish.

          “Wish what?” his mother prodded.

          “I just wish he’d shown me the same affection when I was Charlie’s age.”

          “I wish he had too, Ben, for your sake, but don’t you think he made up for it a little with Charlie? He did us a pretty big favor by watching him, so we didn’t have to pay for a sitter. Charlie learned a lot from him. Don’t you think we owe him a little something for that at least?”

          “I don’t owe him anything.” 

           There was a long silence before his mother spoke again. 

          “Well, I still think you should be the one to go to your sister’s,” she said. “You two need to discuss what’s going to happen to his estate.”

          “There’s nothing to discuss. Everything will be sold, and the proceeds will be split in half.”

          “What about the cottage?” she asked.

           Charlie stopped breathing. His heart thudded inside of his chest as he waited to hear his father’s answer.

          “Well?” his mother asked again.

          “I guess it will be sold.”

          “No!” Charlie cried. 

           “Charlie?” his mom called. “Is that you?”

           Charlie dashed into the bathroom. Hot tears stung his eyes. His father couldn’t sell the cottage! He just couldn’t! 

           “Your breakfast is getting cold,” she said.

           Charlie didn’t care about stupid breakfast. “I’m not hungry,” he answered grumpily.

           “Your mother cooked you a nice breakfast, so you get down here. Now!” his father said.

           Charlie pouted. He blew his nose and went down to the kitchen, where he sat with a slump at the table.

           “Morning, sweetheart,” his mother said brightly. She smiled, kissed him on the cheek, and set a plate of pancakes in front of him.

           “I’ve got to go,” Charlie’s father said, checking his watch. “Try to have a good day.” He reached down to ruffle Charlie’s hair, but Charlie pulled away. His father frowned. “Maybe we can throw the ball around when I get home. Wouldn’t that be fun?” 

           Charlie didn’t answer. He wasn’t talking to his father.

           “Well, see you later, Champ,” his father said. “I’ll try to come home early,” he added before rushing out. Charlie scowled. His father wouldn’t come home early. He never did. 

           Charlie waited for his father’s car to pull out of the driveway before asking, “Why didn’t Daddy like Grandpa?”

           Charlie’s mother stopped washing dishes. “Oh honey, he loved your grandpa. What would make you ask such a thing?” she asked. She wiped her hands on a dish towel and went over to sit with him.

           “I don’t know,” Charlie answered, pushing the food around on his plate. “It’s just that he never came up to the cottage. All the time we were up there, he never came. Not for fishing, not for a barbecue, not for anything.”

           “Your dad’s a busy man, Charlie,” she said, coming to his defense. “He has an important job.”

           “But Grandpa told me that Daddy had a lot of fun at the cottage when he was little. He said he never wanted to leave. If he loved the cottage so much, then he must have stayed away because of Grandpa,” Charlie surmised. “Or maybe he didn’t come because he didn’t want to spend time with me,” he added, though it pained him. 

           “That’s just not true!”  his mother cried. “Daddy loves you very much. He just has a lot of responsibilities. I’m sure he would have gone if he’d found the time.”

           “Well, I’m never going to be too busy to go the cottage,” Charlie said, fixing his jaw. 

           “Charlie…” his mother started softly, reaching for his hand. 

           Charlie snatched it away. “Well, I won’t! And I’m not going to change either! I’ll always want to go. And if you let Daddy sell it, I’m never speaking to you guys again! You just wait and see if it’s true!”  he said. He jumped up and ran to his room.

             Charlie’s parents didn’t talk about selling the cottage again for a while. He hoped it meant that his father had changed his mind, but when school let out, instead of spending the first week of summer vacation swimming and fishing at the cottage, Charlie went to his Aunt June’s. The city was hot in the summertime, and her backyard was an oven in the afternoon heat. She didn’t like to go to the town pool, or to the park, or much of anything that had to do with the outside. 

           Charlie kept thinking about Grandpa and the cottage. He worried about the fish and the chipmunks. He and his grandpa always brought food to feed the creatures. What would happen when there was no one there to feed them? Would they starve? 

           Charlie’s Aunt June drove him home on Friday afternoon. When they got to the house, Charlie’s father was hooking a trailer to their van and his mother was loading suitcases into the back seat. Charlie hopped out of the car. “Are we going somewhere?” he asked. 

          “Yes,” his mother answered. “We’re going up to the cottage this weekend.”

           “Yippee!” Charlie screeched, leaping into the air.

           “Don’t get too excited,” his father cautioned. “We’re only going to gather some of your grandpa’s personal things and to clean the place up a bit so we can list it with a realtor.”

           Charlie’s heart sank. His father had made his decision. The cottage would be sold. Soon, it would be gone forever, just like his grandpa. 

           “If you’d rather stay here, with Aunt June,” Charlie’s father offered, “no one will blame you. There’s a lot of work to do up there. I won’t have much time to spend with you.”

           “I think he should go. It might be good for him,” his mother said, cutting in. “He has a lot of memories there. He might want to see it one last time.”

           “I suppose,” his father shrugged. 

           “What do you think, Sweetheart?” his mother asked him.

          “I want to go,” Charlie decided. It would be hard when it was time to say goodbye, but at least he’d have one last weekend of fun.

          Charlie’s father smiled. “I think that’s a good idea,” he said. “In time, you’ll understand why we couldn’t keep it,” he added, but Charlie knew he wouldn’t understand if he lived to be a million years old. 

           Charlie went into the house to gather some things for the trip. He stopped by the kitchen to fill his pockets with peanuts and crackers. He hoped it was enough to satisfy the fish and chipmunks for a long time.

             Outside, Charlie’s father honked the horn. “Come on you guys! Time’s wasting. We’ve got to get going if we’re going to beat traffic,” he hollered.

           Charlie ran out and got into the back seat of the van. His stomach flipped and flopped. He felt all churned up inside, like his happy and sad parts were fighting with each other.

           Charlie’s mother came out last, juggling a pile of boxes. “Thanks for the help,” she muttered. She tossed them into the trailer and got in next to Charlie’s father. “Do you think we’ll need more?” she asked, but he didn’t hear her. He was talking on his phone about work stuff.  

           “What did you say, Beth?” Charlie’s father asked finally, after he’d hung up.

           “I asked if you think we’ll need more boxes.”

           “If we do, I’m sure there will be places to get some. I don’t know what’s around. I haven’t been up there in years, but there’s bound to be a shopping plaza or something.”

           Charlie turned his attention out the window as they started along. He liked to watch the city get smaller and smaller until it turned into forest. His grandpa used to tell him that there was an invisible fence to keep the city from spilling over and messing up the woods. Green hills lay before them. The car climbed, winding its way up the highway. Charlie watched for the familiar lakes and streams before they disappeared on the descent.

           “This scenery is gorgeous,” Charlie’s mother remarked. “Isn’t it gorgeous? Just look at those valleys!”

           “The glaciers left those holes when the ice melted away,” Charlie said.

           “Well, isn’t that something,” Charlie’s mother said. “I bet your grandpa told you that. He was a very smart man.” 

           Charlie was about to say that he was; that he was the smartest man he knew, but his father’s phone rang.  “Quiet! I need to take this,” he said. He answered and talked on and on about more work things that Charlie didn’t pay attention to. 

           When they reached their exit, Charlie’s father got off the phone. He turned off the main highway and onto the long, country road that ran through the town near the cottage. Charlie spotted the store that he and his grandpa used to go to. He wanted to ask his father to stop in for ice cream, but decided against it. 

           Finally, they came to the fire road that went down to the lake. Pine branches scraped against the side of their van, screeching and scratching as they went along the narrow dirt road. “Well, the road’s still the same,” Charlie’s father grumbled. “You’d think after all this time, they’d have widened it a little.”

           “Oh, that’s all we need are more scratches on this car!” Charlie’s mother tsked.

           “I’m not sure if I remember which driveway is ours,” Charlie’s father said, slowing. “There’s a lot more cottages than there used to be.” 

           “I know which one it is,” Charlie said with confidence. “It’s the next one, right up there.” 

           Charlie’s father turned into the driveway and stopped. Charlie threw the door open and jumped out. He bolted down to the pond, grabbed a handful of pebbles, and threw them into the water. Sunfish darted out from underneath the lily pads and pecked at them, thinking it food. “The fish are still here!” he laughed.  

           “You be careful, Charlie!” his mother warned, as she got out of the car.  

           Charlie’s father got out too, and stretched. “Smell that air!” he said, taking in a deep breath. “I’d forgotten how clean it smells up here. It’s like we’re a million miles from the city and it’s really not that far away.” 

           “It’s pretty,” Charlie’s mother said. “And so quiet. I can see why Charlie’s so fond of it.”

           Charlie’s father joined him at the edge of the pond. Startled by the sudden movement, the sunfish scattered, but it wasn’t long before they made their way back. “Boy oh boy, are those fish still hanging around?” he chuckled. “They were here when I was kid. I used to feed them bread crusts.”

           “I know. Grandpa told me,” Charlie said. “He said you used to stand in the water and let them bite your toes.”

           “That’s right! I did. I’d forgotten all about that,” he said, then grew quiet as he gazed out over the water. His smile faded. “I used to spend a lot of time down here, Charlie. A lot of time,” he said finally. 

           “We could go fishing, if you want,” Charlie offered after a while.

           His father shook his head, as if clearing his thoughts. “I wish I could, but I have too many things to do,” he said. 

           Charlie stuck out his tongue and blew a raspberry.

           “I warned you it wouldn’t be much fun,” his father said and took his phone out of his pocket.

           Charlie sighed and kicked at the sand. “Can we go later?”

           “Shush. Not now, Charlie,” his father said, putting the phone to his ear. After a moment, he lowered it again and inspected the screen. “I don’t seem to have any service out here. Honey? Is your phone working?”

           “Lord, I don’t know!” she huffed, spitting bangs out of her face as she carried an arm load of boxes. “I’m a little busy at the moment.”

            “Hmmm…” Charlie’s father frowned. He zig-zagged around the yard, holding the phone over his head as he searched for a signal. Unable to find a connection, he scowled and shoved the phone back into his pocket. “What were you saying, Charlie?” 

           “I asked if we could go later?”

           “Like I told you before, we came to get things in order, not to play. Besides, I don’t even have a fishing pole.”

           “Yes, you do,” Charlie said. “It’s right inside. It’s the one you had when you were little.”

           “What?” his father croaked in surprise. “That old thing is still here?”

           “Uh huh. Grandpa said he was saving it for when you came back. He saved your tackle box too.”

            “Well how about that,” Charlie’s father said.

           “So, can we go?” 

            His father cleared his throat. “You go on ahead,” he said. “Maybe I’ll come down in a little while.”

           “But there’s only junk fish out here,” Charlie persisted, motioning towards the lake. “Just a lot of suckers and yellow perch. We need to go down to the river if we want to catch any good ones.”

           “Grandpa took you to the river?” 

           Charlie nodded. “All the time.”

           “Well I’ll be,” his father uttered with a snort. “I used to beg and beg him to take me, but he was usually too busy.” Just then, his phone began to ring. He snatched it out of his pocket and answered. “Hello? Oh, hey Tom,” he said, breathing a sigh of relief. “I’ve been trying to call you. The service here is terrible.”

           Charlie sighed and wandered back down to the lake. He hopped up onto the wharf, took his shoes off, and stuck his feet into the cold water, just like he and his grandpa used to do. He shivered, though the sun beat down hot on his back. He felt a pang thinking about how cold and dark it was where his grandpa’s body rested. He peered up at the sky and wondered about the place up there, where his grandpa’s spirit was supposed to be. Did it have a lake or a sun? Did it have ice cream or peanuts? He wanted to ask his father more about it, but he would be mad if Charlie interrupted him. 

           A fish swam up and pecked at Charlie’s toe. He dug a cracker out of his pocket, which by then was more crumbs than cracker, and threw the pieces in. He watched as the fish fought over the food. “You guys are going to have to find something else to eat now,” Charlie told them sadly.

           “Charlie? Ben?” Charlie’s mother called, sticking her head out the screened door. “I made you guys some sandwiches. Are you hungry?”

           “I guess,” Charlie said. He got up and scanned the yard for his father, but he was still on the phone. He picked up his shoes and went inside without him.

            The cottage still smelled like his grandpa. Charlie’s chest felt heavy again as he glanced around. The newspaper his grandpa had been reading the last time they’d come was still laying in the seat of his recliner. His flannel shirt hung over the back. The puzzle they had been working on was half-finished on the coffee table. Charlie’s eyes filled with tears. It hurt down deep inside. He wished like anything that his grandpa would pop out and tell him he was only kidding about being dead. 

           Charlie’s mom came up behind him and laid a hand on his head. “I’m so sorry, sweetie pie. You must be missing him awful bad,” she lamented, leaning down to plant a kiss on his nose.

           Charlie made a face, wiped the kiss off, and ducked out of reach. He didn’t want her to see him cry. “Dad said he might take me fishing later,” he said, changing the subject.

           “That’s great! I guess you better go on and eat then,” she said.

           Charlie had his sandwich alone at the table, while his mother poked around in the cupboards. He’d just finished eating when his father came in. 

           “It’s so nice up here,” Charlie’s mother remarked with a smile. “You never told me how lovely it was. And so peaceful. You know, this is the closest we’ve come to a vacation in years?”

           “It is nice,” Charlie’s father agreed as he gazed out the window. “I’d forgotten how nice,” he added quietly.

            Charlie’s mother yawned. “Well, I’m going to sit and rest for a while,” she decided. “I’m done in. I think I’ll start that book I brought to read. Why don’t you two go off and do something.” she suggested, giving Charlie’s father a wink.

           “I don’t know,” he said, surveying the clutter in the kitchen. “I should start going through some of this stuff.” 

           Charlie’s mother shot him a look. It was the look she gave when she didn’t want to argue but had something to say. 

           “Well,” he relented. “Charlie did mention that he wanted to go fishing.” 

           Charlie jumped out of his chair so fast, it nearly toppled over.

           “Just for a little while, though,” his father said. “What do you say, champ? Want to show me where that old pole of mine is?”

           Charlie ran into the living room and pulled his father’s fishing pole out of the corner. “Here it is. See? Right where you left it,” he said, thrusting it towards his father. “And your tackle box is over by the door.”

           Charlies father took the pole and checked it over. “Man, oh man. I haven’t seen this pole in years. It still looks the same! I hope it works as good as it used to.”

           Charlie snatched his own pole and followed his father toward the door. He hopped around impatiently while his father inspected the contents of his tackle box. 

           “Some if this stuff is probably antique, by now,” his father teased as he sorted through the lures.

           “Everything’s still good,” Charlie assured him. “Can we go now?”

           “Well, these hooks will probably disintegrate as soon as I cast them into the water,” his father said with a frown, “but I guess they’ll have to do.”

           Charlie followed his father outside and together they walked down the trail to the river. Charlie took a few of the nuts out of his pocket and dropped them on the ground for the chipmunks. 

           “You know, when I was your age, I caught the biggest fish of my life down at the river,” Charlie’s father said.

           “I know,” Charlie said. “Grandpa told me. He even showed me a picture. He said it was one of the best days he ever had.”

           Charlie’s father stopped walking and looked at him “He really said that?”

           Charlie nodded.

           “Huh,” Charlie’s father said. “I’m surprised he even remembered that day.”

           “Grandpa remembered lots of stories from when you were little. And you know what? Every time he told me one it kind of felt like you were here.”

            Charlie’s father fixed his jaw. “I’m surprised grandpa had so many stories to tell,” he said, bitterly. “I know he was great with you, but it wasn’t like that for me.”

           Charlie found a loose stone on the trail and kicked it. 

           “I’m sorry,” Charlie’s father said. “I know you loved him very much. It wasn’t right of me to say that.”

           “It’s okay,” Charlie said, even though it wasn’t. He didn’t like knowing that his grandpa made his father feel as sad as Charlie did sometimes. “I loved grandpa, but I love you too. I’m glad we’re going fishing.”

           Charlie’s father smiled. “I’m glad, too.”

           The thundering of the river began to sound through the trees. They were close. Charlie ran ahead. He had a surprise for his father.

           “Wait up, Charlie!” his father said, running after him. “That water is dangerous,” he cautioned.

           Charlie got to the river first and stood in front of the bench his grandfather had placed on the bank. When his father rounded the corner, out of breath, Charlie jumped aside.  “Tada!”

           “What’s this?” his father asked.

           “It’s a bench. Grandpa built it for us. It’s for sitting in the sun while we fish. Look at what he wrote,” he said, pointing to the carving along the back. 

           “‘For Benjamin,’” Charlie’s father began. “’For all the times I wish we’d come but didn’t. For all the….’” His voice cracked. His face crumpled. He turned away from Charlie, his shoulders shaking as he wept.

           Charlie didn’t know what to do. He’d never seen his father cry before. He went to him and wrapped his arms around his waist. “I thought the bench would make you happy.”

           “It does,” his father said, wiping at his tears. “I’m not crying because of that. I’m crying because I have been a fool. I’m so sorry I never came up here with you and grandpa. At first, it was because I was stubborn, then I just got so busy with work, I forgot how much I was missing out on. I bet you’ve been missing me, just like I missed him all those years and I’m sorry for that, too. Can you ever forgive me?”

           Charlie hugged his father tighter. “I have been missing you,” he said. “But I’m happy you’re here now. Do you want meto read the bench?” he asked.

           Charlie’s father nodded.

           “For Benjamin,” Charlie began, proudly. “For all the times I wish we’d come but didn’t. For all the times you can make up for it with Charlie.”

           Charlie’s father scooped him up and gave him a kiss. “I guess I’ve made some mistakes.”

           “Grandpa told me that he made some too, but that it’s never too late to fix a mistake, until it is.”

           “Your Grandpa was a very smart man,” Charlie’s father said, smiling through his tears. Just then, his phone began to ring. He took it out of his pocket. Charlie thought he’d answer it, but instead, he shut it off, and put in back into his pocket.  

           “Almost as smart as you,” Charlie said.

           Charlie’s father laughed. “Well, let’s hook us some fish and then we’ll go back and tell your mother that we’ve decided to keep the cottage. We have a lot of catching up to do.”

      **No part of this story may be copied or reproduced with consent from the author.

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged childhood, family, familyfriendly, fiction, grief, loss, parents, relationships, shortstory
    • THE WILD

      Posted at 11:30 am by writergherlone, on August 14, 2018

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      Photo Credit: Sasha Fleming

       

      THE WILD

      by Kristy Gherlone

       

      Into a wild forest ragged and sharp,

      A tormented mind with thoughts so unsweet.

      Making her way to ascend the escarp,

      To hasten a day a future won’t meet.

      The air sweetened by raspberries and pine,

      Past crystal waters raging swiftly rushed,

      A small child traveled, unseen, not a sign,

      On that mountain, followed quietly hushed.

      Aloft, head laid stones, greened softly of moss,

      Ending a life of unbearable loss.

      And sun, beginning to set on the wild,

      Only then did she happen to see her poor child.

      The waning view of fir waves and lake,

      Morning will find neither one to awake.

       

      *No part of this poem may be copied or reproduced without permission from the author

      **Photo is the property of Sasha Fleming and may not be used without permission

       

       

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged childloss, grief, loss, mountains, nature, parenting, poetry, sonnet, suffering, wilderness
    • Cracked

      Posted at 8:46 pm by writergherlone, on November 6, 2017

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      *Unfortunately, to date, the following story has not made it into the literary pages. It is an old-fashioned story in feel, but a particular favorite of mine, so I thought I’d share.  I hope you enjoy it too! While this one won’t be seen in the magazines, I do have three more that will. “The Forest Fire,” will appear in Edify Fiction on December 29, 2017. “No Parking,” will appear in Fiction on the Web on December 11th, and my new story ( a comedy), was just accepted by Defenestration Magazine. I’ll announce the date for that one as it gets closer. Also, my story, “The Falls,” is now available in print through Wild Women’s Medicine Circle Journal and you can find it on Amazon, if you are interested.

       

       

      Cracked

      By Kristy Gherlone

       

      There were cracks in the driveway. Deep, ugly grooves that marred the surface of the inky pavement.

      Janice cried out in shock. It wasn’t so much the cracks that bothered her. It was that the cracks had weeds growing in them.

      “Honey? Better get those paver fellows to come back. We have cracks…”

      She set her purse and coffee down onto the top of her car, and plucked a lime green shoot from a crevice.

      In disbelief, she held it up to her eyes, squinting as she rolled it back and forth between her fingers. “What in the Sam holy old hell? How is this even possible?” They’d only just had the driveway done a couple of days before.

      She shook her head and threw it down. She crushed it under the heel of her shoe for good measure.

      “Make sure you call them today, too! Those scamming little bastards are not going to get away with this. We paid good money for this driveway, and they’re going to fix it or we’ll sue!”

      She opened the car door. “Did you hear me? I’ve got to get to work. I’m late!” She jumped in and tore away.

      Later that afternoon when she arrived back home, nothing had been done about the driveway.

      I bet Jack didn’t even call, she thought, fuming.  That man is as useless as tits on a boar hog.  If Tommy was home, he would have made sure they’d come right back over.  Such a good kid, Tommy… nothing like his father.

      She sat, holding the keys in her hand, and wondered about her son. She hadn’t heard from him since he’d left for his cross-country trip to college out in Utah. She was beginning to worry that something was wrong. It wasn’t like him not to call.

      Suddenly, there was a rap on her window. She jumped and whirled around. The afternoon sun had dropped below the horizon! It was nightfall!

      “Who’s out there?” she cried.

      “It’s me, Mrs. Sanborn. Your neighbor, Ted Gatsby.”

      “Who?”

      “Ted Gatsby. Don’t you remember me? Is everything alright?”

      Janice felt foolish. Relieved, but foolish. She rolled down the window. “Of course I remember you. How could I forget? You must think I’m some kind of nut, sitting out here like this. I was tired after work. I guess I must have dozed off for a minute.”

      “I was surprised to see anyone over here this morning. I tried the front door when I saw a car in the driveway, just now. I knocked but no one answered. I was about to leave, but then I saw you sitting inside. You scared me half to death. I thought…” He didn’t finish the sentence.

      “No, no. I’m fine. Everything’s fine.” She rolled up the window and opened the door, “Jack didn’t answer when you knocked?” She scoffed, struggling to get out of the seat.  “That man, I swear to God! All he does is sit in that chair and watch television. I have to light a fire under his ass to get him to do anything.” She swung one of her legs out, but couldn’t go any further.

      “Jack? You mean your husband, Mrs. Sanborn?” Ted asked, bewildered.

      “Of course my husband! Who’d you think I was talking about?”

      Ted’s mouth fell open. He didn’t know what to say.

      “Never mind. Give me a hand, will you? I can’t seem to get out of this thing.” Janice laughed, embarrassed.   “Imagine a forty-year-old woman having so much trouble.”

      Ted chuckled awkwardly, but reached in to take her by the arm. Gently, he pulled and managed to get her out. Her legs quivered beneath her as she stood, clinging to his arm.

      “Is there someone I should call for you?” he asked, his voice full of concern.

      “Call? Heavens, no! Who in the hell would you call unless it’s those damn pavers? Did you see my driveway?” She didn’t wait for him to answer. “A kindergartener could have done a better job!”

      “But…” Ted stammered.

      She rolled her eyes and waved him away. “I’m fine. Just a little unsteady. I don’t know what’s gotten into me today, but I’m sure it will pass.   Probably just a bug or something.” She started for the house, but stopped and turned back around. “What did you want, anyway?”

      “Want, Mrs. Sanborn?”

      “Yes, why did you come over?”

      “Oh, yeah,” Ted said, suddenly remembering the reason for his visit.  “I thought, maybe, since you were back, you could use some help fixing the old place up again. I could put a coat of sealant on that driveway for you. I have some left over from a job I did over in Chickory. It might keep the weeds from sprouting up.”

      “So that’s why you’re here?” Janice cried, insulted.  “There is nothing wrong with this house other than that blasted driveway. Old place, indeed! What a thing to say! Our house is the nicest one on this block and you know it! I bet you’re in cahoots with those pavers, aren’t you?”

      “I…well, no! Of course, not,” Ted stammered.

      “I’m not an idiot, so don’t take me for one,” she said, her eyes narrowing in suspicion. “I happen to know a thing or two about contractors. Never met a single one I could trust.”

      “Mrs. Sanborn, please…I didn’t mean to offend you, it’s just that it’s been a while since anyone…you’ve been gone…”

      “Well you can forget it,” she snapped, cutting him off. She turned on her heels, “I paid good money for that driveway not even a week ago, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to pay you too. They are just going to have to come back and fix it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a husband to attend to.” She stormed into the house and slammed the door behind her.

      She threw her things down onto the table and stalked into the den. Jack was sitting in his chair. The television was blaring.  Janice walked over and turned it down. “Can you imagine the nerve of some people? You’d think you could trust your own neighbors! Ted Gatsby thought he was going to con us into paying him for something that should have been done right in the first place. Well, I’ll tell you! It’s a good thing you’ve got me around. I set him straight. And where the hell were you when all of this was going on? Sitting right here, just like always. You know, I’m sick of doing everything by myself. I have a good mind to take Sal Eames up on his offer to run away with him.” She smiled smugly and went off to make dinner.

      The next morning, when she stepped into the shower, she noticed the tiles right away. They were cracked. Not all of them, but quite a few. Splintery cracks feathered the delicate flowered porcelain.

      It wasn’t the cracks that bothered her so much. It was the black mold peppering the rubbery grout that baffled her. She scraped some off with her fingernail. “Jeez Louise!” she muttered.

      “Jack!” she hollered over the rush of running water. “What on earth happened up here? The tiles are cracked! I bet you busted them up when you were trying to replace that shower head, didn’t you? I told you to be careful. If water gets in behind those cracks, we’ll have a mess on our hands for sure. There’s already mold growing. Replace them today while I’m gone, will you?”

      She finished with her shower, dressed, and grabbed her lunch out of the fridge. “Well, I’m off. Don’t forget about those chores,” she told Jack before stepping outside.

      She started down the walk, but something on the side of the house caught her attention. She whirled around and froze.  There were cracks in the foundation! Deep fissures ran all the way from the bottom edge of the siding to the ground. Gaping, jagged edges of concrete. Lush green moss clung tightly to the rough gray surface. It was unsightly. Horrified, she dropped her lunch.

      “Jack? Jack! Get out here! We have real problems.”  Stunned, she staggered over to the foundation and dropped to her knees. She began pulling the moss out in clumps. “Did we have an earthquake?  Did you see anything about an earthquake on the news?”

      When Jack didn’t answer, she got up and went back into the house. “Jack?” she yelled, going from room to room.  “Jack?”

      She found him in the den.  “I’ve been shouting for you. I should have known you wouldn’t hear me over that stupid television.”  Exasperated, she snapped it off. “Don’t you ever do anything else besides watch TV?  Did you hear me? I think we’re going to have to call the insurance company. I think we’ve had an earthquake. I’ve got to get to work. Make sure you do it today and get an estimate.”

      She hurried back outside.

      “Mrs. Sanborn?” A voice called to her.

      Janice’s head snapped up. She shielded her eyes from the morning sunlight.

      “It’s just me, again, Mrs. Sanborn,” the voice said, getting closer.

      Janice recognized the voice as Ted Gatsby’s. “I don’t want to talk to you,” she snapped. She hurried over to her car, opened the door, and threw her purse inside.

      “Mrs. Sanborn, I called Gloria. Just sit tight, okay?”

      “Gloria?” she croaked, her anger momentarily forgotten. “My Gloria? Whatever for?”

      “Yes, your Gloria. Your daughter! She was glad to hear that you’re okay. She was very worried about you.”

      “Worried? What on earth for? You didn’t drag her into our spat, did you? You had no right! She needs to be studying instead of worrying about what’s going on here. Why don’t you just mind your own business, Mr. Nosey.” She scowled and got into the car.

      All the fuss and bickering made her tired. She leaned against the door and closed her eyes. A few minutes later, she felt herself falling and nearly toppled out of the car. “What on earth!” she bellowed.

      “Mama! Oh, mama! You can’t imagine how sick I’ve been with worry,” Gloria wailed. She grasped her mother’s shoulders, and tried to right her again.

      “What?” Janice demanded, confused. She looked up at the sky. The position of the sun told her it was late afternoon! She’d fallen asleep again!  She shook her head, “Gloria! My God, girl, what are you doing here?”

      “I’m sorry mama. I didn’t mean to frighten you. It’s just that when Ted called…” she began to cry, “I’m just so glad to see you.”

      “For crying out loud! It’s only been a couple of weeks since daddy and I dropped you off at school. The way you’re carrying on, you’d think we hadn’t seen each other in years. Well, never mind. Give me a hug you foolish girl.” She rolled her eyes, but smiled as she let Gloria help her out of the car.  “I can’t believe you let Ted Gatsby talk you into coming home from college for something so ridiculous. Well, daddy will be glad to see you anyway. Let’s go in and say hello.”

      Gloria sniffled as she led her mother up the walkway. “Mama, I think we should talk,” she said, helping her mother inside and onto the couch in the foyer.

      “You didn’t flunk out already did you?” Janice tsked. “Is that what all this blubbering is about?”

      “No mama. I…”

      “Something worse then,” she pursed her lips and frowned.  “Well, go and get your father. Whatever you have to say, he should probably hear too. God! I hope you’re not pregnant,” she huffed, clutching her chest.

      Gloria searched her mother’s eyes.  “Please tell me you remember about daddy, mama. And Tommy. You do remember, don’t you?” She reached up to cup her mother’s cheek.

      “Remember what? What has gotten into you today?” Janice said, pushing her hand away. “You just go and get your father, like you’re told.”

      “Mama,” Gloria began gently, “Daddy isn’t here. He’s been gone since the week after Tommy left us.

      “Gone? What are you talking about? He hasn’t gone anywhere. He’s right in the den.” She got up and started down the hall. “Jack! You get out here and see your daughter.”

      “He isn’t here,” Gloria said again.  She got up too, and hurried after her. “He couldn’t be.” She caught up and reached for her mother’s shoulder, trying to stop her. “Daddy’s been dead for nearly thirty years.”

      “What?” Janice yelped, pulling away. Her face flushed scarlet. “Why would you say such a thing? Have you gone mad? He’s watching television, the old fool.” She made it to the entrance of the den. She stopped and thrust a finger towards her husband’s chair. “See?” she said. “He’s right there.”

      Gloria followed her in. She walked over to the chair. She held her breath, and turned it around. Other than an old drop cloth, it was empty!

      “What in the world?” Janice cried. Her eyes were frantic as she searched the room. She ran around, opening all the closets, and checking behind all the furniture. “Jack? Don’t play games now! Your daughter is here and wants to see you.”

      “Mama, stop. Please, just stop. Daddy isn’t here. He’s gone. He died of a heart attack. And Tommy died in the accident on Route sixty-six on his way to college.”

      Janice’s hand flew to her mouth. “No! That’s not true! You’re lying,” she rasped.

      “I’m so sorry, but it is true. You have to believe it. You have to remember!”

      Janice began to shake. A flood of horrible memories rushed into her brain, though she tried to push them out. “No!” she wept. “I don’t want to remember!”

      “You have to. I need you! Your grandchildren need you”

      “No, no, no,” Janice shook her head. Her legs gave out and she sat with a slump onto the couch.

      Gloria went and sat next to her. “I thought when Ted called and told me that you were here, that you were starting to remember again. Was I wrong?” she asked.

      “Here? This is my home. Where else would I be?”

      “At the center, mama. We had to take you there after daddy died. You’ve been there all this time.”

      “It can’t be,” Janice said with horror. “It just can’t be.”

      “But it is.  They called when they couldn’t find you yesterday. They didn’t know where you’d gone. We’ve all been so scared. You can’t imagine my relief when Ted called. I thought, then, that you were starting to come back to us.”

      “Come back to you?”

      “Come with me mama.” Gloria got up and held out her hand.

      Janice hesitated, but finally took it and followed her out into the hallway. Grandma’s antique mirror still hung crookedly on the wall, next to the back door.

      “Turn around, mama. I want you to see yourself.”

      “See myself? I’ve seen myself a million times,” she said, but turned towards the mirror anyway.  The woman she saw starring back at her was old. An old woman with crazy, deranged eyes!

      Frightened, she took a step back. Her hands reached up to feel her face. Deep cracks and creases lined her cheeks and forehead. Her lips were dry and puckered. Crinkles erupted next to her eyes as she stood there grimacing. “I’m old,” she whispered. “I can’t be this old. I was just forty a few months ago…”

      Gloria reached over to rub her mother’s back. “It’s been thirty years since you were forty, mama. You’ve been gone a long time, too.”

      “Am I back now?”

      “I hope so, mama. I really hope so.”

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged age, family, fiction, grief, illness, loss, mental, shortstory
    • The History Lottery (excerpt)

      Posted at 12:39 pm by writergherlone, on August 8, 2017

      IMG_0135This is a busy time of year for magazine submissions and contests. Please accept my apologies for the dwindling posts, as I have been working on completing my short story selections.

      Be sure to look for “Ice Cream or Moxie,” in Short Fiction Break this Friday, August 11, and the entire version of “The Falls”, coming up in the print version of Wild Women’s Medicine Circle Journal.

      For today: Here is an excerpt from one of my novels, which you can find on Amazon and Barnes & Noble:

      This novel has had excellent reviews and is a favorite with my readers.

       

      “Maize Getchell was just ten years old the night she went missing from the small town of Carlton, New Hampshire, where she lived with her father, Raymond Getchell, former Chief of Police. Rachael Somes, a clerk at the store from which Maize was taken, was only nineteen when she was shot and killed that same night by the man who is presumed to have taken Maize.”

      Raymond turned up the volume, put the footrest up on his chair, and took a giant swig of his beer. It always caught him right in the gut every time he saw a picture of her. It took his breath away. He’d chosen the picture to be shown every year. It was his favorite. She’d been caught in mid-laugh. He loved the way her nose had wrinkled in that way, and the way the sun caught the highlights in her orange-blonde hair. She had a lot of her mother in her. It was a picture he’d taken of her on their trip to the beach the summer before she went missing. The last vacation he’d had with her. She’d told him that it had been the best vacation of her life.

      “On April sixteenth, seven years ago tomorrow, Maize was taken from Beale’s Hillside Convenience at approximately eight o’clock in the evening by an unknown man. She would have been seventeen this year.”

      The news played a brief clip from a surveillance video that had been shot from outside of the gas station. They paused the frame on the abductor, but it wasn’t a clear shot.

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged fiction, government, grief, loss, lottery, love, murder, mystery, novel
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